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Funnystuff
Pick up lines not to be used!
(1) i wanna melt in your mouth, not in your hands!
(2) your so hot, you melt the elastic in my underwear!
(3) nice shoes!!! wanna fuck?
(4) hey can i flirt with you??
(5) your dad must have been a baker, cause you got a nice set of buns!!
(6) all those curves and me with no brakes!!
(7) if i told you that you had a beautifull body,would you hold it against me?
(8) fuck me if im wrong, but dont you want to kiss me??
(9) grab his/her ass! pardon me is this seat taken?
(10) is it hot in here? or is it just you?
(11) can you give me directions? to where your heart is!
(12) if i could rearrange the alphabet! id put u and i together!
(13) how about you sit on my lap and well see what pops up!
(14) do you know what would look good on you? me!!
(15) i miss my teddy bear! would you sleep with me?
(16) how about you and i go back to my place and get out of these clothes!
(17) i lost my phone number, can i have yours?
(18) i hope you know cpr, cause you take my breath away!!
(19) excuse me is that semen in your hair??
(20) my face is leaveing in 15 minuites. be on it!
(21) that outfit would look great crumpled in a heap on my bedroom floor!!
(22) lets go to my place and do the things ill tell everyone we did anyway!!
(23) would you be my love buffet?? so i can lay you out on the table and take what i want!!
(24) you must be tired? (why) you been running through my dreams all night!!
(25) my names ( say name), but you can call me lover!
(26) my names(say name), thats so you know what to scream!
(27) can i borrow a quater? (wait for why), so i can call my mum and tell her i met that
i met the girl of my dreams. i want to call your mum too and thank her!
(28) is your dad a theif?? ( wait for no), then how did he steal the sparkle of the stars
and put it in your eyes?
GET READY WITH QUICK RESPONSE IF SAY YES!!
(29) What do you say we go out for a pizza and fuck? (if no) "you dont like pizza??
(30) look at his/her shirt tag! (when ask what doing reply) " checking to see if you was made in heaven!
(31) (tap your thigh), you just think this is my leg!
(32) say thats a nice (outfit/dress/shirt article of clothing), can i talk you out of it?
(33) The word of the day is "LEGS" lets go back to my place and spread the word!!
25 reasons why beer is better than woman!
(1) You can enjoy a beer all month long!
(2) beer stains wash out easily!
(3) you dont have to wine and dine a beer!
(4) Your beer will always wait patiently in the car
why you play football!
(5) when a beer gose flat, you toss it out!
(6) A beer dosent get jealous when you grab another beer!
(7) beer is never late!
(8) hangovers go away!
(9) beer labels come of without a fight!
(10) when you go a bar, you can always pick up a beer!
(11)) beer never has a headache!
(12) after you had a beer, the can is still worth two cents!
(13) a beer wont get upset if you come home and have another beer!
(14) if you poor a beer right you always get good head!
(15) A beer always gose down easily!
(16) you can have more than one beer in a night and not feel guilty!
(17) you can share a beer with your friends!
(18) you always know if your the first one to open a beer!
(19) a beer is always wet!
(20) you can have a beer in public!
(21) beer dosent demand equality!
(22) a beer dosent care what time you come home!
(23) a frigid beer is a good beer!
(24) you dont have to wash a beer before it tastes good!
(25) if you change beers you dont have to pay alimony!!